through this website, AAFSW receives a small percentage to help fund out activities and services. AAFSW is also affiliated with 
The
Cyberspouse: November, 2002
Online Resources for Simple Living
As the holiday season approaches, the Cyberspouse has been devoting some thought, and, naturally, some of her surfing time, to the concept of Voluntary Simplicity.
What exactly is this voluntary simplicity thing? Put, well, simply, it is the idea that less is more. That one's life can actually be more enjoyable and fulfilling if one has fewer things and consumes less.
We in the Foreign Service have a unique perspective: who among us hasn't been struck by the complexity and speed of American life is upon returning to Washington DC from some sleepy tropical outpost? Every time the Cyberspouse plants her dainty toes Stateside, she is left breathless by the increasing pace of life, and the growing quantity and focus on Stuff. Washington DC seems to be one giant gerbil wheel with the inhabitants frantically running to reach some mysterious goal. It is not clear what that goal is, or whether the gerbils will be happy when they get there. Questioning this cycle; searching for a meaningful goal, and figuring out how to get there, is the essence of voluntary simplicity, otherwise known as simple living.
Sure, some proponents of voluntary simplicity can be rather annoying. Yeah, you think, after reading about a millionaire stockbroker who retires early take up fishing full-time, wads of cash would definitely make my life simpler too. And then there are the barefoot and pregnant types. Ha, you say, you would have to be pretty "simple" to actually enjoy eating beans at every meal and making your kids' underwear out of feed sacks.
In fact, you don't have to be a millionaire or a zealot to enjoy some of the benefits of this philosophy. Simple living attracts different people for different reasons. For some, obviously, it's not a choice; it's a financial necessity. Some choose to live simply based on religious principles. Some people may choose to adopt simplicity as a means to an end, such as allowing one parent to stay home with the kids. Others may choose to live simply in order to pursue a fulfilling, but low-paying, career. Still others, especially in the Foreign Service, may be trying to make a life that is by its very nature hectic and disorganized a little easier to manage.
The basic principles of voluntary simplicity are as follows:
Environmental consciousness: what we do, buy and use affects the whole planet; therefore, as Americans and the biggest consumers on earth, it is our responsibility to make sensible, sustainable choices when we can.
Time is money, but money is also time: every purchase "costs" the time that we spent earning the money to pay for it. Therefore, if you need less, you can work less and enjoy life more.
The best things in life can't be measured in monetary terms: meaningful work, good health, well-adjusted kids, good food and conversation, a well-ordered, tranquil household, etc. Making time to create and enjoy these things is the goal of voluntary simplicity.
Of course living simply is not really new at all: just ask your grandmother, who always knew that "use it up, wear it out, make do, or do without," would take her a long way toward living well. The "voluntary" part of the equation, does, however, change with every generation, as our culture and environment change, and we become materially richer. For a more in-depth look into the history and philosophy of voluntary simplicity, try Alternatives for Simple Living, an organization that dates back to the 1970s, at http://www.simpleliving.org.
Voluntary simplicity chiefly manifests itself in the choices that we make, from choosing bulk, locally grown apples over the styrofoam-packaged imported variety, to choosing a fuel-efficient vehicle over a gas-guzzling SUV. You don't have to make the simple choice every time, and the simple choice is not always the obvious choice. Simply saying "no" is often the best choice. Not buying is at least as important as buying.
Well, that's no fun, you say. Actually it is! Have you ever felt the sense of accomplishment attained after an end-of-tour "purge?" If you've lived in poor countries, you certainly know the pleasure of seeing clothes that had been stuffed in the back of your closet worn happily by those in need. Then there's the joy of opening your closet afterwards and not having stuff fall on your head, and the relief at seeing five coordinated outfits you really like instead of twenty that you don't even remember buying. Just try to maintain that blissful combination of doing good and bringing sanity to your life, and you'll be practicing voluntary simplicity.
Speaking of closets, organization is quite important to simple living. Not is it less stressful to be organized, say advocates of voluntary simplicity, but being disorganized actually costs money, and therefore, time. The Cyberspouse discovered this for herself recently when she went shopping for school supplies with her daughter, a rather hectic and expensive exercise. A few days later, she organized her own office. To her dismay, she found every single item on her daughter's school supply list had been hiding in her office all along. Why, she asked herself, did she own nine highlighters? Because she hadn't known where eight of them were, of course! Now her office supplies are bundled with rubber bands and stored in a rolling container under the bed. The next time the kids need school supplies, the Cyberspouse will not be spending an hour of her life at the Czech supermarket-two hours if you count the time value of the money spent. We'll go "shopping" under the bed instead!
Simple living advocates fervently believe that keeping your home and your life organized will lead to using and buying less as well as having more time to enjoy life. For that reason, simple living websites usually devote a lot of space to organizing techniques and/or link to other websites on this subject. Two popular websites are The Organized Home (http://www.organizedhome.com), which presents useful ideas in a clean, easy to navigate format, and The Fly Lady (http://www.flylady.net.) The latter site is really an experience unto itself, with a focus on "decluttering your life," and a lively, coach-like tone. You can even sign up for daily emails in which the "Fly Lady" will badger you to scrub your sink or clean out your closets. Not for the faint of heart, obviously.
The Cyberspouse will now take a moment to opine on the subject of household management. The reader may recall a course called "Home Economics" that was standard fare in schools until about twenty years ago. In the Cyberspouse's time, both girls and boys attended in order to learn everything from cooking to budgeting and balancing checkbooks. Home Economics has gotten a bad rap since then, but in fact, it is a profession and a very valuable one, whether it is full-time or part-time. The Cyberspouse believes that the Home Economist deserves a small, well-stocked workspace to call her own, whether or not he or she is also employed outside the home. This workspace doesn't need to be fancy: a desk, basic computer, and small file cabinet will do the trick. Shoeboxes are great for sorting bills and receipts. This space should be inviolate: free from anyone else's clutter, especially the kids'. If the Home Economist can get just a few undisturbed hours in her office per week, this can pay off in great savings on credit card charges, late fees, and other bills. In addition, think of all the insurance claims that can finally be filed, merchandise that can be returned for a refund, rebates that can be mailed in, and money that can be saved by comparison shopping online. Time spent on household management is an investment with a high rate of return.
Which leads to another basic element of simple living, frugality. Keeping in mind that money is actually time, of course you want to spend as little of it as possible, say advocates of voluntary simplicity. Therefore, you'll see a lot of money-saving tips on simple living websites. The grandaddy of them all is the Dollar Stretcher (http://www.stretcher.com), the home page of a newsletter by that name, and a sort of virtual community for cheapskates. Search the extensive archives for tips on everything from auto maintenance to kids' birthday parties.
However, it should be noted that "simple" purchases are not always the cheapest purchases. From a voluntary simplicity point of view, it makes just as much sense to buy one thoughtfully chosen, well-made item that will last a long time, as to buy two or three cheaper, but shorter-lived items. In fact, some would say that it makes more sense to buy the former, because you will ultimately spend less of your valuable time shopping, and you will save the planet at least two items' worth of labor, materials, and packaging. It's this "big picture" perspective which takes mere frugality to the level of voluntary simplicity.
Or, you can not buy anything at all. This is especially difficult to accomplish in the Foreign Service, where not only do changing climates, auto restrictions, and houses require us to purchase items that we might not otherwise need, but we are usually presented with a new and tempting assortment of crafts and artwork with every assignment. Most of us feel obligated to send these knick-knacks home to relatives as well.
Obviously, our lives can only be so "simple," in the Foreign Service, but here are some ideas: consider placing a six-month moratorium on buying any local handicrafts after arriving at post. Chances are, that cute little thingie you admired on the first CLO shopping trip may not look so cute after you've seen five hundred of them. Try asking your family this year if they actually want you to send them items from post for Christmas. It could be that they've secretly been stashing your gifts in the attic for years and will be relieved not to receive any more!
To reduce the costs of moving, try placing an ad in your next post's newsletter in advance of your arrival offering to buy post-specific items from departing personnel. Other families may be quite happy to sell you their 220-volt appliances, for example, if they are going back to a 110-volt country. Try to buy a car from a departing family if you can. Large heavy items, such as playground equipment or backyard pools may also be available since they are so hard to get into a shipment. Not only will you save money on these necessities, but you'll simplify your life by saving yourself the trouble of ordering and shipping expensive items. Don't be too proud to ask!
Foreign Service families can do a lot in the electronic age to get organized and cut down on clutter. One Foreign Service spouse archives all of her digital photos electronically, using software that creates "photo albums" on CD. She only prints out the pictures that she wants to frame or give away. No shoeboxes full of photos, and no heavy albums to put in carry-on luggage! The Cyberspouse took her bank (USAA) up on an offer to send all banking and insurance documents electronically instead of by mail. She downloads her bank statements and insurance policies in Adobe PDF format and stores them on her hard drive (as well as on CD for backup.) This has cut her paper files down by about 25 percent and saved several trees. Nearly any reference document can be scanned and stored in this manner instead of on paper, and it wouldn't be a bad idea for backing up legal documents that you must keep paper copies of as well. When you move, you can just pop a couple of CDs in your carry-on bag instead of carrying heavy files around. (Leave a copy with a friend or relative as well for additional security!)
We in the Foreign Service are quite fortunate to be relatively financially secure, and to have seen such a variety of lifestyles, nearly all of them simpler than our own. If anyone should understand how small and fragile the world really is, we should. On the other hand, we are constantly being hit with unexpected expenses and tempted by merchandise at every turn, more so now that the Internet has brought a little bit of American mall culture into our homes abroad. And we have to uproot and move every two to four years, which isn't exactly a simple way to live! Voluntary simplicity presents us with a new way of assessing the millions of choices that we make. The Cyberspouse hopes that you will use these resources to further explore this fascinating topic, and make your life just a little bit simpler.
Websites and Books
Your purchases of books or magazines through the links below will benefit AAFSW through our affiliation with Amazon.com!
Voluntary Simplicity:
Diagnosis:
Affluenza
Well-designed and humorous companion website to a PBS documentary. "Affluenza"
refers to the negative side effects of simply having too much.
Alternatives for
Simple Living
Dating back to the 1970s, this organization started as a response to Christmas
excess. A good place to get an overview of voluntary simplicity.
Center for the New
American Dream
Non-profit organization promotes "More Fun, Less Stuff!" Interesting
list of publications.
The Simple Living Guide: A Sourcebook for Less Stressful, More Joyful Living by Janet Luhrs. While there are many book out there with similar titles and on the same subject, the Cyberspouse likes the non-preachy, practical tone of this one. Lots of good ideas to be incorporated into anyone's life.
Living
Simply
Low-budget site is clearly written and has good, basic tips on simple
living along with book reviews and links.
Frugality:
The Dollar Stretcher
This venerable email newsletter's website includes several years of archived
articles on all manner of money-saving topics. Very useful if you are
willing to skim over the ads for budgeting products.
How to Raise a Family on Less Than Two Incomes. The Complete Guide to Managing Your Money Better So You Can Spend More Time With Your Kids. By Denise Topolnicki. Written by a former editor of Money magazine, this book should be required reading for all Foreign Service couples. Good advice, especially in the area of establishing financial security for the lower-income or no-income spouse.
Your
Money or Your Life: Transforming Your Relationship With Money and Achieving
Financial Independence. By Joe Dominguez and Vicki Robin.
Written in the roaring '90s, this book can go a little over the top as
it describes how work basically sucks the life out of you. However, the
money problems and solutions described in the book are sound, and this
book has become a classic of personal financial management.
Organization:
The Organized Home
If you're just starting to get your act together, this site is for you.
The Fly Lady
The Fly Lady will help you declutter your life-or else!
Real Simple
Voluntary Simplicity for those for whom it is truly voluntary. Slick publication
has good design, storage, dinner ideas, but be warned that frugality is
not part of the picture.
Miscellaneous:
The Slow Food Movement
Originating in Italy, this organization promotes quality over quantity
in food and drink. Crop diversity and support for small farmers are also
part of the equation. Slow Food now has chapters in many countries, including
the United States.
Don't Buy It!
Sponsored by PBS. this site aims to make kids aware of marketing tricks
and help them make good consumer choices through online games and quizzes.
The Cyberspouse is contributed by Kelly Bembry Midura, website designer, freelance writer, stay-at-home parent, and veteran Foreign Service Spouse. She is currently working on a book about frugal living for families in the Washington, DC area. Click here to read more "Cyberspouse" columns. Email Kelly at kelly@aafsw.org.