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I'm Not a "Newbie" Any More!
by Robbin Calvert Kuchova
In an old song, one of the verses went-- to live, love, laugh and be happy--but alas, that is not reality. It is even more of an impossibility when one is selling everything, saying good-bye to friends and loved ones, giving up jobs they enjoy, and heading off to an exotic new land to put down temporary "roots" for a 2-4 year period.
Of course, this new Foreign Service lifestyle has numerous unique and exciting aspects, but when you are a "newbie" sometimes things can be extremely challenging and exasperating, to say-the-least. However, the most awesome realization takes place when you realize you are not a newbie any more because:
...government acronyms become as common to you as your ABC's
...you locate a server that connects you to your "lifeline" email and the internet
... all your goods arrive
...your goods arrive with minimal loss or breakage
...you accept and remember that tap water and fresh foods can bring on personal times of worship at the porcelain alter
...you don't have to rely on your sponsor or the CLO for relevant information...you appreciate having an APO (when things you need are only available from the States)
...you actual remember to use the numerous transformers and converters needed to operate 110 appliances (after accidentally frying several electronic devices)
...power outages don't drive you nuts when cooking for a dinner party or trying to complete a project
...the sound of the native language becomes as familiar to you as sounds of daily life and you actually get what you think you asked for
...you can tell time from the "call-to-prayer"
...you can find local goods and services which brings some normalcy to your life instead of always being on the hunt
...those providers of goods and services that you've located accept credit cards and the statements come in correct
...you gleefully find a good tailor, shoe repair service and, more importantly, competent computer and vehicle maintenance service providers. And, most importantly, is locating competent medical services and prescription medication sources
...you appreciate having a competent GSO (General Services) team, which sure beats calling for numerous service providers back in the States
...you fully comprehend how fortunate you are to have a BX, CX, PX or commissary
...supplies you've brought with you from the States run out and you can find the actual item or an acceptable substitute
...you comprehend the currency and conversion rate when comparison shopping
...you can maneuver your vehicle around the city; find your planned destination; return to the point where you dropped off your child hours ago and be able return your child's friends back to their homes
...you can tell when a cab driver is taking you the long way or charging the higher night rate in the daytime
...you don't contemplate committing suicide after driving across town, navigating through grid-locked traffic with horns blaring and drivers screaming
...you accept cell phones as an extra appendage
...you can order in a restaurant
...you develop the method of shallow breathing in a smoke filled restaurant
...you can travel countrywide and feel comfortable
...you find household help
...you and your household help advance to having the same understanding regarding household operations and child care...your children enjoy their school and you're satisfied that they are getting a quality education (quality based on what is available)
...you find suitable employment (based on what is available)
...you locate a place of worship that feels comfortable for you and your family
...you develop friends and gain a social life via volunteering, joining associations, frequenting cultural events, etc.
...you find a method to continue educational pursuits
...you develop worthwhile or satisfying projects, hobbies, expand your talents and/or find ways to contribute to your new society
...you can be comfortable and continue to live a positive full life while your spouse travels extensively
...you can cope when the weather remains undesirable for weeks or months at a time
...you feel comfortable in your new country and don't long for the past
...you can say good-bye to your new found friends when either they or you leave for the next post
My thought is for you to use this as checklist to help you evolve through the newbie stage and get on with the aspect of savoring each new experience, post and country. I'm certain you will have additional experiences and personal milestones to add to this check list. Above all, I have found remaining flexible and open to new experiences; reveling in conquering the new challenges; and changing what I can and accepting what I can't alter allows me to proceed to that sweet, comfort zone where you feel at peace with your emotions and your new surrounds.
I say this even with another major new challenge facing us, this summer, that of the "bidding process" and being successful or unsuccessful vying for our first, second or third choice and emotionally moving on, no matter what the outcome. Also, it will indeed be hard leaving this wonderful country, Turkey (we had already extended for an additional year), with its marvelous people and travel opportunities, not to mention all the great folks at post that we'll miss.
Yes, this monumental challenge remains. And with it, comes additional opportunities for interpersonal growth in handling whatever the old "bidding process" and life decides to offer us. We continue to consider the Foreign Service life an unsurpassed opportunity to experience the world and its people and feel privileged to have this unique opportunity.